4 Heartbreaking Things People Battling Depression Won’t Tell You

By JW Holland

Over time in my life, especially before I started treatment, I had times when depression and anxiety would almost completely shut me down. I still managed to appear alive and well, but inside, there was nothing but fear. The kind of fear that only allows you to see doom and everything in life that ends badly.

It’s not a good feeling at all, but the effect it has on those around me is just as hard on me.

My wild mood swings put strains on even the best of relationships. It is usually written off as hatred or a general ill will, but it is much more.

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Those of you who have struggled with this terrible ordeal will understand. The problem, however, is that people who are not cursed with this disease sometimes find it difficult to accept that it is out of the control of the person affected.

What seems small to you is out of proportion to us, and the reactions seem extreme and out of line.

At my worst, I was a horrible person, unable to reason or be comforted. I will throw away all the common decency I have and take my pain out on whoever is there. If you’ve made the slightest mistake or said the wrong thing at the wrong time, you’ve seen a different side of me, one that I’m not proud of.

Those times were hard for everyone, especially me. In my head, even as they were happening, I was yelling at myself inside to stop, just stop! But I can’t, I don’t know how, and sometimes I wonder if I still want to.

There were many things I said at that moment, most of them I regret, but the problem was all the things I couldn’t say. The things that won’t really come out of my mouth.

My brain doesn’t allow it; my feelings held them in place my depression locked them away in a place I couldn’t access. For many of us, especially men, it is difficult to fully express our emotions, feelings, and thoughts. When you mix depression and anxiety, those things become a near impossibility.

In those moments, there were things I couldn’t say no matter how hard I tried. Many men have the same struggle, and it’s important to recognize that this is the case.

#Heartbreaking #People #Battling #Depression #Wont
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